LOCK OF THE CENTURY: ITS CHRISTMAS!!! NFL&NCAA WEEK 1 LINES ARE HERE

 

It’s finally here!!! Football gambling spreads.  There is no better time to be a complete degenerate than during football season.

NFL Week 1 Locks of the Century:

Atlanta Falcons(pick) @ Chicago Bears(pick): BEARS

New England Patriots(-4) @ Miami Dolphins: PATRIOTS

Tennessee Titans(+2.5) @ Jacksonville Jaguars: TITANS

Carolina Panthers(+3.5) @ Arizona Cardinals: CARDINALS

 

NCAA Week 1 Locks of the Century:

SMU(+14) @ Texas A&M: TEXAS A&M

Alabama(-8.5) @ Penn State: ALABAMA

Boise State(-1.5) @ Georgia: GEORGIA

Miami Florida (-4) @ Maryland: MIAMI

 

Parlay these if you want to be a billionaire by September 10th.

 

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Turns out LeBron James Sucks After All

Last night was amazing.  The Heat are a joke.  Lebron has to be the worst “superstar” in the history of the NBA.  This shouldn’t surprise anyone.  Lebron has sucked all along.  He flat out quit on the Cavs last year because the Celtics were too tough on him.  Then this performance in the NBA Finals has sealed his legacy in my mind forever.  I don’t care if he wins 10 championships, he will always suck.  People were so quick to crown him as the greatest of all time.  ESPN is a joke.  Yeah he hit a few big three pointers against the Celtics and Bulls, but guess what…Robert Horry has hit clutch shots in the playoffs, he isn’t the greatest of all time.  Lebron is a quitter and a loser.  Last night was the perfect opportunity to assert himself as a superstar and leader with Dwayne Wade missing so many minutes with a bruise, but he failed. 

The Heat are so smug and arrogant.  That’s why everyone in America hates them.  I couldn’t believe when I saw them mocking Dirk for being sick after he kicked their ass when he was sick.  Hey Lebron, just because Dirk scored like triple the points you did, doesn’t mean that he wasn’t sick.  It means he’s a leader and you’re a loser.  Last night proved that if Dwayne Wade isn’t superman, then the Heat can’t win because they don’t have another leader on the team.  I hope Dallas finishes off the Heat in Miami.  The Heat don’t deserve a championship and neither do their fans.

The Mavs are America’s team and are truly a team.  Getting big time contributions from Kidd, Marion, Terry, and led by superstar Dirk Nowitzki.  Tyson Chandler is giving the Mavs defense and rebounding.  The Bulls used to have a guy named Tyson Chandler back in the day.  Top 5 draft pick.  That guy was a total bust.  Man did he suck.  Whatever happened to that guy?

I picked the Heat and the under in my Locks of the Century yesterday. “Taking the Heat on the moneyline at -105, Heat against the spread, and the under…which of course means the Mavs probably win a shootout, and I wouldn’t mind a bit.” Well, wouldn’t you know it, that’s exactly what happened.  Haven’t looked at the lines for Game 6, but you can bet I am going back to the Heat well again if it means a Dallas Mavericks win.  You’re welcome America.

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Lock of the Century: NBA Finals Game 5 Edition

Miami Heat +1 @ Dallas Mavericks -1

I’ll be the first to admit that my NBA Finals Locks of the Century haven’t been the greatest. Costa Rica is kicking my ass in this battle.  Taking Miami in every game has burned me.  Miami is really underachieving, Lebron in particular.  All of these losses are making me feel like the Gambling Gods are trying to punish me by picking and therefore, rooting(kind of) for the Heat.  Well jokes on you Gambling Gods. I’d gladly lose money everyday if it meant that the Heat would be denied a Championship.  So, having said that…give me the Heat.  Lebron is not going to be held to 8 points again.  He has been out-scored by the Boston Bruins 12-8 in the last three days.  No way that trend continues.  Even with Lebron struggling, the Heat have still been in every game.  I think Lebron takes over today and has a huge game.  Proving that he is more fueled by what other people say about him than by winning championships.  He really needs extra motivation?  Jordan would have dominated the Mavs in an empty gym in Siberia because all he cared about was winning.  Lebron takes games off in the middle of the NBA Finals.  Thats the only argument I need.

Over/Under Total Points 184

Every game has been in the 80s and I don’t anticipate that changing now.  The games have been slow, not a ton of possessions and both teams have been bringing in on the defensive end of the court.  88-84 Heat win tonight.  Taking the Heat on the moneyline at -105, Heat against the spread, and the under…which of course means the Mavs probably win a shootout, and I wouldn’t mind a bit.

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They are who we thought they were: Canucks are AWFUL

I am not going to sit here and say I told you so, but I totally did.  The Canucks are a joke.  The softest team in the league. Unworthy of being in the Stanley Cup Finals.  The Canucks are a classic “fake tough” team.  They will push you and try to get under your skin by diving, chirping, biting, throwing head shots, and complaining.  If you stand up to them and push back at them they will completely crumble.  The Bruins took it to the Canucks physically and they whimpered away. 

NHL Network was really rushing to the defense of the Canucks last night. “Kesler must be hurt. Luongo has vertigo. Burrows is menstruating, blah blah blah”.  Truth of the matter is that this is just who the Canucks are.  They are a group of cowards who barely beat an injury depleted Blackhawks team in a rebuilding year. They just suck. 

Now I even think Vancouver is delusional.  Bieksa called Tim Thomas “leaky” in the post game and said that they were showing him too much respect.  Yeah, real leaky goalie in net for the Bruins.  The Canucks have scored under 2 goals in three of the 4 games and on top of that Thomas has more hits in the series than the Sedin Sisters combined.  Showing him too much respect? How, by trying to slash the stick out of his hand and running him every chance they get?  Burrows even tried to fight Thomas.  Who fights a goalie?  Burrows is pathetic. 

The only chance the Canucks have to salvage this series is to start Cory Schneider, but even the Boston native Schneider sounded like he wanted to part of the Bruins. “None of the goals were Roberto’s fault. He deserves to be in there for game 5.” Come on now, Cory.  You went to Phillips Andover and graduated from BC with honors in 3 years, you’re smarter than that.  Luongo’s legs were more open than Lindsay Lohan’s on the Peverly goal.  Ryder’s shot looked like a peewee shot it.  The only goal that wasn’t on Luongo was Peverly’s second goal.  Other than that Luongo was responsible.  Maybe Schneider doesn’t want to alienate his hometown team. Maybe he is afraid of the Bruins.  Maybe he is just as delusional as the rest of teammates.

This series is over.  I originally predicted the Bruins winning in 7 games, but now I don’t think it will take that long.  Long live the Original 6.  AMERICA.

 

PS I love Milbury in between periods.  Calls the Canucks “smug and arrogant” during game 3 and has the line of the year when he referred to the Sedin Sisters as “Thelma and Louise”. Just perfect. If NBC could replace Pierre McGuire with Darren Pang it would be the greatest hockey broadcast crew ever assembled.

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Sweet Game Lebron

You’re so vain, you probably think this blog is about you
You’re so vain, I’ll bet you think this blog is about you
Don’t you? don’t you?

Where is Scottie Pippen now?  Lebron sucks.  I always knew it.  Even when I said he was great I also said he sucked.  He is who we thought he was.  In the biggest game of his life and with an opportunity to put a strangle hold on the NBA finals, Lebron James stat line for the night read as 8 points, 8 rebounds, and 7 assists.  Way to come through in the clutch “King James”, really Jordanesque.  Lebron couldn’t even shut down Jason Terry who had his best game of the series with 17 points.  Meanwhile, Dirk Nowitzki is just doing his thing.  Hitting game winners, fighting off the flu, and trying to save America from the Heat. 

Lebron is a loser. Plain and simple.  The Heat should have swept the Mavericks, but Lebron making dumb decisions in game 2 and disappearing in game 4 is the reason why this series is knotted up at 2 games a piece.  I picked Miami in 5 as my lock of the century, but now that is out the window and I am free to root for America’s team.  The Havana Heat are dead to me.  Go Mavs.

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Vindication Via The Bruins

That felt great.  The Stanley Cup Finals has displayed to the greater hockey world what the Vancouver Canucks are all about.  They love to chirp, they play dirty, the dive, they bite, and they throw gutless blind hits to the head.  Finally, somebody besides the Chicago Blackhawks has the sand to stand up to the Canucks and punish them for disrespecting the game of hockey.  Now the Bruins have discovered the final piece to the puzzle that will let them beat Vancouver.  If you punish them physically, out work them, and frustrate them…the Canucks will lose their cool, take dumb penalties, and quit.  Luongo looked completely rattled for the last 40 minutes.

Last night’s game was an absolute beat down.  The Bruins physically and mentally dominated the Canucks from the second period on.  I feel vindicated by this series and I am 100% on the Bruin bandwagon.  The Bruins are the opposite of Vancouver in so many ways.  They have tough guys who are confrontational, but they are more than willing to answer the bell when challenged.  I love the way they play.  Even Tim Thomas got into the hitting game last night when he checked one of the Sedin Sisters. 

The Bruins most likely will not score in abundance like they did in game 3, but they need to duplicate the level of intensity they brought for the duration of the series.  They are still trailing and they must continue to attack Vancouver across all 200 feet of the ice surface.  I was completely wrong about Shawn Thornton.  I wanted Seguin in the lineup and I undervalued what Thornton brings to his teammates with his toughness and energy.  Thornton is just flat-out scary and the ref tossing him out of the game mid way through the 3rd period may have save somebody’s life. 

I have one final thought on last night’s game.  Game exemplified why I love hockey and the NHL more than any sport.  The NHL has an element of frontier justice.  Burrows was a punk(and a difference maker) so Shawn Thornton smashed him early in the game to set the tone.  Burrows takes a swipe at Tim Thomas late, so Milan Lucic turns into hockey’s version of Wyatt Earp and doles out the punishment immediately behind the net.  No other sport or league has this mentality of self policing and standing up for your teammates.  I can’t wait for Game 4 as I am sure the hatred between the teams is about to boil over.

The Bruins told the Canucks they are coming…and Hell is coming with them!

Bruins in 7

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Lock of the Century: Gold Cup Soccer Edition

Canada +700 @ USA -315 Draw +325

 

Over (+140)/Under (even) 2.5

So I am taking the fight right to the Costa Rican’s back yard on this one with my first ever Soccer Lock of the Century.  If there is one thing Costa Rica knows its soccer…at least I assume so.  Doesn’t scare me one bit.  I am turning up the heat in this fight. 

Canada sucks.  I didn’t even know they had a soccer team until today.  If I didn’t know about you, that means you aren’t any good.  The moneyline at -315 for USA isn’t all that attractive, but a win is a win is a win.  The over/under is where it gets a little tricky.  We have established that Canada sucks, but after watching part of the USA vs Spain game this weekend I am under the impression that America sucks too.  So will the ineptitude of both teams lead to defensive break downs and an onslaught of offense or will it be a race to the bottom essentially with a 1-0 win for the US?  I’ll go with the under and an American victory.  U-S-A, U-S-A!!!

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Lock of the Century: NHL Finals Edition

Vancouver Canucks +105 @ Boston Bruins -125

The Bruins are coming home after having their hearts ripped out in consecutive games in Vancouver.  The Bruins have played much better than I thought they would and definitely deserved better in Game 2.  Alex Burrows getting 2 goals and an assist in a game for which he should have been suspended for biting has got to be a bitter pill to swallow.

The Bruins essentially played the Canucks even in both games and are a good bounce or two away from maybe being up 2-0 heading home.  The Boston Bruins have too much pride to bow out in 4 games and they will use their crowd made up of 18,000 guys from “Southie” to push them over the top.

It’s also time to give Seguin some bigger minutes.  Skate him with Bergeron’s line every once in a while.  He could give the Bruins an added dynamic and it could also keep the aging Mark Recchi more fresh if he takes a few shifts off during the game.

This is a must win game for the Bruins and they have the sand and the skill to get it done at home.  The Sedin Sisters will fold like always in the face of a hostile environment. Bruins and the under tonight.

Lock of the Century: Stanley Cup Finals Game 2

Boston Bruins +165 @ Vancouver Canucks -195

 

I want to say that the Bruins deserved better in Game 1, but that would be incorrect.  Tim Thomas deserved better.  Vancouver was the superior team, and their skating advantage was obvious.  Tim Thomas was superman in Game 1.  General rule of thumb is that I hate goalies, but Thomas is different.  He has incredible passion and never stops fighting.  Boston must get to the net in Game 2.  All of their chances came from the outside.  Luongo has a history crumbling when guys get in his face.  The Bruins were physical in Game 1, but it seemed like the Canucks were often the ones initiating.  Boston needs to be the “Big Bad Bruins” in game 2.  Milan Lucic…I am looking in your direction. 

Bruins will play desperate, Thomas will shine again, Bruins win a close one. 

Lock of the Century: NBA Finals Game 2

Dallas +180 @ Miami -220

Dallas +4.5 @ Miami -4.5

Costa Rica is in shambles after I demolished them in Game 1. Going 4-0-1 in various bets.  They are so scared that they haven’t even posted prop bets for this one knowing full well that I will rob them blind again.  Game 2 will play out just like Game 1 did. Relatively close for 80% of the game, and then Miami’s talent will just take over in the 4th.  Miami will not only win, but they will also cover the spread.  Dallas just doesn’t have the horses to win a game on the road.

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My future First Lady of Costa Rica