Home > Internet Sensation > North Korea can’t even threaten to blow shit up right anymore. Kim Jung Il must be spinning in his grave

North Korea can’t even threaten to blow shit up right anymore. Kim Jung Il must be spinning in his grave

(WSJ)–In response, South Korea’s Unification Ministry called the threat a “grave provocation.” Police have been stationed around several major newspapers and TV networks in Seoul since KCNA statements started mentioning the organizations a few weeks ago. Trouble is, the coordinates North Korea published were wrong. Perhaps that shouldn’t be surprising. But only one Seoul newspaper, Seoul Shinmun, noticed the coordinates didn’t match the locations of the newspapers KCNA said the North’s military had in its rocket sights. Martyn Williams, a former Tokyo-based technology journalist now on a fellowship at Stanford University, also took the few minutes needed to determine how they were screwed up. (We saw the statement Monday and gave it only a passing read because the bluster seemed the same as ever.) The KCNA statement described one newspaper as being at 37 degrees, 56 minutes and 83 seconds North and 126 degrees, 97 minutes and 65 seconds East. But as everyone who has finished third grade knows, the minute and second numbers shouldn’t exceed 60 when it comes to expressing geographic coordinates.

 

Bad day to be a North Korean.  If they can’t even properly threaten to blow up South Korea, then what do they have left?  Gone are the Cold War days where they would just pal around evil superstars like USSR, China, and Cuba.  Even after the Berlin wall fell they at least had the coolest evil dictator on the block.  Kim Jong Il always rocking stunner shades and keeping people on the edge of their seats.  Hell, they were apart of Bush’s “Axis of Evil” for christ sakes.  Now…they’ve got some fat kid with no swag running their country into the ground.  Can’t even get the coordinates right of the newspapers he wants to blow up.  For shame.  Kim Sung-Il isn’t walking through that door, Kim Jong Il isn’t walking through that door.  Now I get why all of those North Koreans flipped their shit when Kim Jong Il died.  I mean yeah they didn’t have food, they didn’t have electricity, and they didn’t have jobs, but at least they had a bad ass Eternal President.  No longer.  Might as well unify at this point.

 

PS: Miami delenda est

 

Follow the Chief @WindyCitiSports

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